Speaking in tongues…

…is usually a sign of possession. However, I think this extract from an email I received is proof that I work for a robot of some description. The only time that you’ll see the English language mutilated this badly normally is when you translate it via the intratubes into Japanese, and then back again. Twice.

Option will not be workable moving forward . Our contract with the NLA has a 6 month limitation for scanning titles/sections on the NLA digital database we received. Of course the issue regarding re-processing needs/ quality/non received within SLA -needs finalising with them, as in this case we need the scan copy, but outside of this come March we must use the feeds. Therefore do we need to consider putting a case to the NLA – option 1, and in the interim sort another workable solution with abbey.

Just so you know, context doesn’t help. This email makes no sense whether or not you’ve seen the rest of the conversation.

I know I think of myself as a bit of a grammar snob, and I realise that some people – Melvin – think of me as a complete cunt when it comes to reading their emails, but there is no excuse for this standard of writing. The woman who sent this to me is the boss of my boss, is educated to an MA standard, and is paid at least double my salary. She could at least make an effort to be understood.

I need a new job.

Published in: on February 12, 2007 at 3:45 am  Comments (4)  

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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I have to decifer with this shite all fucking night!! And it doesn’t help that I rarely get the chance to speak to these people face-to-face, and have to forward on instructions to staff who are looking at me like “WTF????”

  2. I’d pretend to be astounded, by I can’t muster the energy. What’s slightly more frightening is that the text above is probably a fair representation of the depth and quality of thought applied to the problems of the nightshift news team by thy beloved management.

    Having spent some time with a babelfish, and translated the above text to japanese and back again [twice], I can now confirm its meaning:

    “Fuk off i got biskit.”

  3. Also, you might be glad to know that you’re not the only one who has to deal with know-nothing numptys – http://www.iansie.com/nonsense/blog.html#Monday2

  4. […] in day-light, will they?”. Occasionally, I was known to get somewhat frustrated, both with the job and with the hours, but I got by happily enough before leaving on good terms with my […]

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